I’m incapable of trusting people who have never been in love. Well, maybe I’ll give them the benefit of the doubt up to a certain point, but if you’ve hit 26, 27, and still never been in love, frankly, I think there’s something wrong with you.
People inevitably claim they “haven’t met the right person yet,” or they’re “busy,” or they’re “not looking,” or whatever. Fine. These things may be true. And I know I obviously come from a position of privilege in this department, having been blessed with exceptional luck and evolutionarily-friendly breeding. That said, if someone is approaching the three decade mark and has never been in love, and hasn’t been pulling a Mowgli or something, all I see is a person who is unworthy of my trust.
If you’re a sufficiently social and unhideous person and have never been in love by 27, all I see is a person who is so afraid of the world that he refuses to live fully. There are nearly seven billion people in this world. Most of my demographic, and, therefore, I assume most of who read this blog, grew up in a city or town with a decent number of people, then went to college with a bigger number of people, and then worked and/or went back to school with even more people. So, let’s say, conservatively, that in the past 10 years I’ve met 2000 people, 1000 of whom I would remember, and 777 with whom I am facebook friends. Who could exhibit such hubris to say that none of these 777 is lovable?
When I see someone who is of a certain age and has never been in love, well, I just think he’s sketchy as hell. He may be a “good guy,” he may have lots of positive qualities, I may enjoy spending time with him, I might even consider him a friend, but I do not trust him, and I do not think he is whole, and I feel sad for him. At the end of the day, though, I am not in a position to trust someone who distrusts others so much that he refuses to give himself to them. I find that sketchy as shit. And, frankly, while I may enjoy this [type of] person, and spend excessive amounts of time with him, I will never value him as a good friend until I know he is open, selfish, and selfless enough with others that he lets himself love.
At the same time, I recognize that me saying I can’t quite love someone who doesn’t love others is somewhat hypocritical.
But, the thing is, you’d just be so easy to love, and it’s a shame not to do so. I have some trouble completely forgiving those who deny you.
P.S. Anybody who ever gets my random title references totally gets Bonuspünkte.